For June 11th:

“O LORD, You have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.
 Before a word on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD.
 You hem me in- behind and before; you have laid Your hand upon me.
 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; too lofty for me to attain.” Psalm 139:1-6

Who knew? Of all the days He could have chosen, He determined that Mother’s Day would be the day I would become a mother. Mother’s Day…He chose Mother’s Day! I had been celebrating my own mother every Mother’s Day for the past 27 years and now I would join the celebration on this very day as a mother myself. As I cradled my baby girl, so fresh from God, I can still feel the embrace of my mother. Her golden eyes glistened as they spilled joy, baptizing me, her only child with mother love. Soon, the time came for my husband (who was dressed in his “Proud New Daddy” t-shirt, which is a story for another time) to take our baby to the nursery for the all-exciting newborn measurements. Our entire family followed this father-daughter duo in the hall march with great enthusiasm…everyone but my mother, that is. In the sacrificial fashion so common to mothers, she forfeited the chance to follow the crowd and chose to stay by my bedside. Over the years, she had made the sacrifices that come along with and go beyond mere mothering. Just after my fourth birthday, my father died unexpectedly in her arms. She instantly became a widowed parent struggling to make ends meet, all the while searching for the beauty in the ashes. Fast forward through countless trials, prayerful pleas, unimaginable pain and yes, the sanity-saver called laughter, here she was, still sitting by my side. Little did I know that only weeks later it would be me sitting by her side as she lay in a hospital bed. Little did I know that I had just celebrated my first Mother’s Day as a mother and my last Mother’s Day as a daughter. Who knew? God knew…that’s Who! God knew He would be calling home the only one who had forever been by my side. God knew I would need a reason, other than myself, to go on without her. God knew my dependence was not resting on Him alone. God knew that he could make beauty from ashes. Twenty-two years later, after much ash sifting, His beauty is blinding to the eyes of my heart. Who knew? He knew!

Bonnie White